As Christmas approaches I am filled with mixed emotions. Holidays have a way of doing that to me. Thanksgiving went well, and it was such a blessing to have all of my adult kids home. Both of my daughters make me proud every day, and it was the first Thanksgiving in many years that my son has been clean and sober. For that, I will be forever grateful. I am incredibly proud of him for fighting so hard to turn his life around.
I’m going to pick my son up tomorrow and he’ll stay with us through the Christmas holiday. I’m so looking forward to seeing him, yet I have to be always on guard against the anxiety that could easily replace my joy. This will be the longest period of time he has spent at home since his arrest. He will have access to his old drug buddies. He may face temptation. His girlfriend is in the same situation and will be spending time here too. She also may be faced with temptation. Here is where I really have to practice the art of letting go of things I can’t control. They both know their future lies in their ability to resist the temptations they may face and stay clean.
I have watched in amazement as the good Lord has seen fit to work miracles in their lives. He has shown over and over how much He loves them. Not only has my son been clean for almost 7 months now, but he has a job, is going to church, and attending 12 step meetings. Miracles.
I’m not naïve enough to think the battle is over. I know my son will have to fight this demon the rest of his life. For now though, he is clean, and I am thankful. His future is unknown. He still has the justice system to answer to and that is in the Lord’s hands too. Christmas is a reminder of God’s great love for us, and I will hold onto the knowledge that He loves my son even more than I do.
I continue to pray every day for all of the addicts and the people who love them.